fallingtowers:

everyone’s got that one homie who zealously adheres to his inflexible code of honor even though it has long since become a burden to him

(via corvidcall)

fvmilivr:

cursebearing hips

(via taiga-fujimura-official)

spongebobssquarepants:

(via pikamans)

onedudesview:

(via imperial-nuisance-rudje)

sharkodactyl:

sharkodactyl:

sharkodactyl:

sharkodactyl:

sharkodactyl:

my dnd party has run into an npc who may or may not be evil and may or may not decide to betray us and the dm was in chat today like “just so everyone knows…not addressing this comment at anyone in particular…his favorite colors are red and black…wink” so now i’m desperately trying to get a real physical friendship bracelet done before session tomorrow in the vain hope that i can somehow stop this npc from trying to do a murder on my party

UPDATE: the npc was in fact a shapechanged adult black dragon with violence and conquest in his heart. however he did let merry put a friendship bracelet on him and then when she was like “hm okay how big is your wrist in dragon form” he was like “you wanna see?” and then turned into a dragon and let merry measure him for a second, dragon-sized friendship bracelet. the dm described him afterwards as being deeply confused as to why he did this or let any of this happen to him. call that the merry effect

this guy is now a recurring npc because merry was SO determined to make him her friend that it actually somehow worked. he cast dream to talk to one of my party members like “hey…how’s it going…how are the tieflings in the party…not that i care…also i’m not lonely. bye” and the player was like “is he still wearing merry’s friendship bracelet in this dream” and the dm was like “yeah…”

fsdfjhskdf the dm just sent us all this image

so merry taught naeric (the dragon) the power of love, obviously, and because his heart was open and beautiful he started dating…a SECOND evil dragon. and then that gf betrayed him and cast ninth level imprisonment on him so now naeric is our damsel in distress and we have to save him from his girlfriend, the actual villain. how the turntables…

and. in the most horrible plot twist of all. the gf stole his friendship bracelet.

(via a-dauntless-daffodil)

rhymingwithpurple:

sorry i can’t stop thinking about this. it’s finally our month honey

(via bonez-soup)

a-dauntless-daffodil:

hachama:

If you use self-deprecating humor, that’s fine. It’s not my cup of tea, but it’s fine.

If you use self-deprecating humor AND you’re depressed or have a poor self image, I strongly suggest switching to hyperbolic self-aggrandizing humor. I truly believe it’s 100000% healthier long term AND I think it’s much, much funnier.

For example

*trips over a speck of dust*

Option 1: haha, I’m such a klutz, I’ll probably break my neck opening a jar of pickles someday

Option 2: I AM THE MOST GRACEFUL PERSON WHO EVER LIVED YOU SAW NOTHING

say not “Oh my god im dying i can’t do this haha im soooo bad at marathon running im gasping so hard i think might cough up a lung heehee”

says instead

“WE DWARVES ARE NATURAL SPRINTERS!!! VERY DANGEROUS OVER SHORT DISTANCES!”

himeno-ran:

there is a demon in your house named CARBON MONOXIDE. he enchants your mind with confusion and your body with exhaustion. you need to call a powerful exorcist named HVAC TECHNICIAN

(via fartgallery)

arienai:

arienai:

Happened to glance over at my coworker and her phone was at just the right angle and she is ON TUMBLR. what if we have reblogged each other and don’t know it.

LMAO????

(via reallycoolsoup)